- Anti Joke

What did the raisin say to the toaster? Nothing. The raisin lacks a central nervous system, and the toaster is an inanimate object.

Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

chuck norris does not know how to use a plunger.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream...?? Because he got hit by a white van

What's the difference between an alien and Obama? - Nothing they are both aliens.

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? Neither, many scientists believe that the first living organisms on Earth were single-celled, prokaryotic bacteria.

don't just stand there

why did the girl fall off the swing? because someone threw a fridge at her.

Knock knock. Who's there? Boo. Boo "who"? Boo Radley. I live down the street.

jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

-Why was little Johnny sad? >Why? -Because he had a frog stapled to his forehead.

what do you call a girl with a pumpkin spice coffee in her hands? Jenifer

Excuse me sir, do you know where I can find the restroom? I don't know, I'm sorry.

How do you wake up a black man? Punch him in the face.

When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What did the raisin say to the toaster? Nothing. The raisin lacks a central nervous system, and the toaster is an inanimate object.

A baby crawls into a bar. He cannot walk.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

what does 2+2equals? i think its 3 but i could be wrong

What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

"Ask me if I'm a tree!" "Are you a tree?" "No."

Why didn't Fred answer his phone? Because Fred is a tree.

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

knock knock come in