- Anti Joke

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

What do you get when you cross a cow with an elephant? A deformed organism

One guy asks another guy, "Why did the sleeping man get sucked into the sinkhole?" The other guy replies, "I don't know, I heard about that a few months ago, it seems highly improbable statistically. "

what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

What do you call a fish with no eyes? Astyanax mexicanus, a subspecies of Mexican tetra that lives in a subterranean habitat and as such has structurally degenerate eyes that have atrophied over the course of evolution.

whats the difference between a pizza and a jew? Pizza is not human, Jewish people are.

What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, we have a drink named after you!" Surprised, the grasshopper replies, "You have a drink named 'Bob'?"

Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

what is the difference between a jew and a pizza? Jews are people and regularly attend a synagogue and pizza is and italian food that many people find to be enjoyable to eat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What is brown and salty? A pretzel.

what's the difference between me and callum ? a couple of miles.... and id like to keep it that way

Yo momma so stupid, she failed the 2nd grade math

A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero Because it's impossible.

Haiku's are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

What's sad about Justin bieber getting thrown off of a cliff Nothing

If a quiz is quizzical, what's a testicle?

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. ----- Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

How do you get a clown off a swing? You kill him with an axe

Q: Why did the wihte man buy a burger? A: cuz he was hungry

Why can't Abraham Lincoln tell a lie? Because he's dead.