What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What's red and funny? The holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Hey i just met you, and this us crazy! Heres some toilet paper, wipe my ass maybe?

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock Knock. Who's there? The Ambulance. Ambulance who? Sir, we're going to need you to come down to the hospital, your son is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why couldn't the blonde get pregnant? Because she was dead, and her reproductive organs had stopped functioning.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

YO MAMMA SO SKINNY SHE HULA-HOOP THIER A CHEERIO

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What did the arsonist shout out in the movie theater? Nothing. He set the exits ablaze and said absolutely nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Thank you so much Nero, I have read it and I am crying because I am happy, at first I was worried because I have never cried out of happiness before. But its over. Nero, you underestimate yourself a lot, promise me we will work with that together, sometimes you almost convince me you are as inferior as you say, but then you get out of your shell of doubt your past has caused in you (its not you when you doubt yourself its what they put in you), you are always there when people need you, teach me hypnosis someday and let me remove that part of you which does not allow you to believe in yourself. Dont reply Nero, calm down and sleep, I feel you are allright, I just know.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

who has less of a soul then you? a ginger

thumb_up thumb_down -30

why do black people like watermellon? becasue it is a delicious red fruit at a wonderful price

thumb_up thumb_down -30

why did the man have a hole in his face? because syphillis had eaten a hole in it

thumb_up thumb_down -30

roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

thumb_up thumb_down -30

a blonde takes 1 hour to swim 100m of breaststroke.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

WHY DID THE MAN RUN A MILE?.BECAUSE HE WAS TRYING TO CATCH HIS NOSE AND GET A TISSUE

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

thumb_up thumb_down -30

What is black, white, and red all over? A zebra that was shot by poachers.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what's better than winning the special olympics?.. Not being retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Who would win Coolio or Vannlia Ice? nieth because Chuck Norris did a round house kick.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A buddhist walks up to a hotdog stand asks the server to make him one with everything

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Q: Why did the Asian boy pass the math test? A: By studying with dedication to the field.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

A postal worker creeps past a sleeping bulldog. The dog does not wake up, and the mail is delivered successfully.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

thumb_up thumb_down -30

How do you hide an Elephant? You paint it's toenails pink and put it in a strawberry patch. Have you ever seen an elephant in a strawberry patch.? It must work pretty well then!!

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops