Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

8===D

Two Muffins are in an oven the first Muffin says "whew it's hot in here." The other Muffin turns around and yells "Duh!!!."

What do you call an arab ?

There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

Rock a by baby, In a tree top When the wind blows The cradle will rock, When the bough breaks The cradle will fall And down will come baby Dying on impact.

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

Why was the kid crying? Cause he had a frog stapled to his face.

what would be the most epic fight ever chuck norris vs superman vs all legendary pokemon vs a giant who would win it me (im superman)

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

why did the girl fall of her bike She had no arms

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

knock knock no no you go now i clean

-What's funnier than a dog with no legs? -The movie Dumb and Dumber, in my opinion.

Click here for free sandwich.

Sometimes i like to stand on my chair and pretend that i am a carrot.

what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

Fat people

How do you tell if a kitten is alive? Throw it at the wall.

There once was a student named Bob. Every morning he would rush to his job. But one day there was rain, He slipped in front of his train, There used to be a student named Bob.

Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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