Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

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Q: What is red and smells like blue paint? A: Green paint.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped.

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Enough Red to share, RAWR! With me only though! But hey, do me a favor wear your glasses not your contact lenses. "That anime" do you watch anime? Or hentai or whatever?

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There are two men on a dock. The first man says, "What's your name?" The second man says, "GET OFF!" because he has turrets.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops.

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Why did the blonde leave the lamp on while sleeping? Because it helps to see in case you need to get up in the middle of the night. YOU THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO SAY "BECAUSE THEY'RE A LIGHT SLEEPER!" MUAHAHAHAHAHA

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm allergic to both Now I'm dead

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What's worse than hitting your funny bone? Nothing

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

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What's greenish blue, smelly, and mushy? The fungus under my sink.

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What's smaller then a midget? A baby midget.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

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What is the difference between a trampoline and a baby? You take your boots of before jumping on the trampoline!!!!!!!!!

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Q: What kind of time is it when you fall from a ladder and are moments from landing straight on a operational circle saw? Moral: ITS TIME TO SPLIT!

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how did the woman get her baby to stop crying? she hit him with a axe

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What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Potatoes have skin, i have skin, so therefore i must be a pig

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What do you call a black prostetut with braces. A black and decker pecker wrecker

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roses ar red violets ar blue i have aids

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What Mistake Do Ghosts make? None ghosts dont exist..

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What did one dinosaur say to the other? Nothing and if you think dinosaurs talk you might need to be diagnosed for having Schizophrenia. Invega is a subtle treatment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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