Why did a 36 year old Asian man stop in the middle of raping someone A: He realized that what he was doing was immoral and that it could scar someone for the rest of there lives and that he could serve a sentence of up to 35 years which would mean he would miss out on the special offers that QVC has to offer during this time

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper... used to clean up a crime scene.

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Why did the young boy die from Aggressive cancer? ...Because there isn't a cure.

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How did Helen Keller’s parents punish her? By grounding her.

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What's worse than getting a apple and finding a worm in it. Getting hit in the face with a meteorite.

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What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? rockband

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How do you make the queen of england cry? You rape her violently.

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Do you know what lmnop is? No. A group of five consecutive letters.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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What do you call it when a black guy is talking to a white guy? A conversation.

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Why was the fat guy so sad? Because he knew he would die sooner or later, just like every other human being

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Why are all black people fast? They aren't its a stereotype.

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Why didn't the man go to the movies?? Because he likes pie.

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Your momma's so fat she has diabetes and my have to get one of her legs amputated. It's actually quite sad.

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What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

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Lucy laughed at the joke. Then realised she had gangrene.

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What did the biological child say to his adopted sister? We are both loved equally by our parents.

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Why can't Osama bin Laden make anymore terrorist attacks? He's dead.

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why didnt the little boy say goodbye to his mom because he got hit by a bus

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ash Oh hey Ash, I was expecting you, come on in!!

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A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are stranded at sea,the brunette swims 1 quarter of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns.The redhead swims 3 quarters of the way to shore, gets tired and drowns. The blonde swims half the way to shore, gets tired and swims back.

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How many fat people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Three. One to hold the ladder, another to screw it in. The third one stands to the side, just in case it breaks.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops