How do you stop an ice cream headache? Run in front of a bus.

What is the difference between a painting and Jesus? It only takes one nail to put up a painting

-On a scale of one to ten, what's your favourite colour of the alphabet? -The answer is yes, because aliens don't wear hats.

If life gives you lemonade.

An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

Why was the baby crying? He had just witnessed his parent get brutally murdered.

Jackie Chan: Who the **** is chuck Testa? A: Chuck Testa was an internet sensation who became famous after his video on Youtube advertising his taxidermy business, Ojai Valley Taxidermy.

roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

Pickles are powerful

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

what did pedobear say to the 60 year old man nothing he was too busy molesting the girl across the street

Who is the greatest cook ever? Adolof Hitler

Bryson got a concussion...he died

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

How do spell____? awk moment when u try asking someone how to spell something over text but they have no idea what ur saying

A Mormon walks into a bar

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Someone threw a fridge at her

Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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