Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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What do you get when you cross a shark and a squid Nothing thats impossible

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how many drunk drivers does it take to drive home one and only one, if more than one drunk driver tried to drive home at the same time in the same car they would surely crash and not make it home.

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What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

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What's worse than getting shot? Getting shot twice.

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whats long and black on a black guy slavery

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Roses are red. They also have thorns. Their family is Rosaceae and they are often given as gifts between lovers. They grow in well drained and fertile soils...

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What do you call a gay dinosaur? Megasoreass What do you call a lesbian dinosaur? Lickalottapuss What dou you call a gay dinosaurs dog? Megasoreass Rex

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Why did Suzy cross the road? She didn't she got hit by a bus. Knock, knock! Who's there? Not Suzy!

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What did the calculator screen say? Cos0=1

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What's brown, sticky, green, yellow, and orange that rides a unicycle? I have no clue, that's why I asked.

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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When the poop hits the fan and you walk in with your pants around your ankles, it's a bad sign!

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One day a man discovered he could suck his own penis. Unfortunately he was heterosexual and could derive no pleasure from doing so as he was acutely aware of the fact he had a penis in his mouth.

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Whats black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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whats up with that? i'm from jersy

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A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

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Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

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How do I make my penis 12 inches? Tug on it.

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Me and my friend wanted to burn some calories so we found a fat kid and lit him on fire!

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A cow went into a meadow and ate some grass. Some time later he wandered off.

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Your momma is so dumb... that when she took an IQ test she score pretty low on it.

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WILLY

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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