How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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Why was the clock off? Because it was broken

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Jack Stevens

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What's black when its clean and white when its dirty? A black guy that rolls in flour.

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what do you call a child with bruises on his face? Child protective services.

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Why did the plane crash? Because, it's pilot was a bagel.

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what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

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You know whats funny? Women's rights

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America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

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Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

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What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

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How do you make an egg laugh? You can't. Eggs are inanimate objects which are incapable of emotion, thus laughter.

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my mom just came up and saw me masturbateing

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What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

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Two colleague janitors sit next to each other in the coffee room, one says to the other: About yesterday... I checked three times and it looks pretty normal. Sorry... I wasn't around to hear the question the other posed the day before, but I heard it's supposed to be pretty funny with this answer. So... Less is better then none, right?

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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A Mormon walks into a bar

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Q. Where do all funny jokes come from? A. The people who made them up

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

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Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? She was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops