A man finds a lamp and rubs it and a genie pops out and says he'll grant him 3 wishes. The man says "I wish I had a trillion dollars for which I can buy whatever my heart desires" and poof he gets it. The man says "I wish I had a beautiful wife for which I can love forever till the end of time." and poof he gets it. Finally, his 3rd wish he says "I wish I have my own country for which I can rule as king and become the greatest ruler in history." and poof he gets it.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

what do you call an albino brown bear a polar bear

Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

- why did the chicken cross the road? why? - to get to your house. - knock knock. who's there? - the chicken.

Two scientists walk into a bar The first says “I’ll have some H2O.” The second says “I’ll have some H2O, too.” Both of them receive water because the bartender is not irresponsible enough to serve concentrated hydrogen peroxide as a drink.

What did the taxi driver say when the black man got in to his taxi? Where to sir?

Q. What did the Muffins say to the man? A. Nothing, muffins are inanimate objects therefore unable to speak.

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I am gay.

What did the black guy say to the white guy running off the cliff? Watch out! You're running off a cliff!

What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the axe murderer. Did it work? No.

Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they're all dead

So you're floating down a river on a two story canoe. How many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house? Four because snakes have no legs.

David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

What's long and black The unemployment line

What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

What's sad about 4 black people in a Cadillac going over a cliff? The incident happened to substantiate stereotypes and condone racism.

Why was Helen Keller a bad driver? Because it is very difficult for someone with a vision impairment to operate a vehicle.

cats, swimming, northpole ,sky, park , tree , bench, anti joke. shut up you have a skin disease!

Knock, Knock Come in

what happens when you step on a bear trap? Alot of pain.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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