What do you get when you don't wear protection? A baby.

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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Theres a girl you like, and a you are playing football with friends. You see the girl about to get hit by the ball, but you catch it. She says "Your a life-saver" and hugs you "You scream touchdown!!!" to impress her, you spike the ball on the ground and it hits her in the face.

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Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

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Why did the man have no head? It was blown off in Iraq 2 and days ago

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way do Japan bomb pearl harbor because America hat sex with China [watch Hetalia]

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Whats funny about a guinea pig water skiing? The part where he explodes.

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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A dyslexic blind man

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What do you get when you cross an l with a line? A t.

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My wife told me that I should see things from a woman's point of view. So I looked out the kitchen window.

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why dont you throw rocks at a mexican on a bike? its unethical and can severely hurt the individual on the bike

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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You can go out to eat without posting it on Facebook.

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What did the fish say to the Asain man Nothing. a fish can not talk

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Pandas Everywhere!!!

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Q. What do you call a black pilot A. A pilot

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

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why did the blonde fall down a mineshaft? Beacuse the rapist needed somewhere to hide the body

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Sometimes you have to stop and smell the roses. Unless they are next to the trashcan where you put your little sisters diapers

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SOME PEOPLE ARE LIKE SLINKY’S. PRETTY MUCH USELESS BUT MAKE YOU SMILE WHEN YOU PUSH THEM DOWN THE STAIRS. Source: http://www.pingzic.com/funny-whatsapp-status-to-make-others-laugh/

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whats red and smells like cherries red cherries

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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