What did the meteorologist say when there was tornado? There is a tornado 7 miles West of the station.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

Relax, close down the place, he wont get very far. The rest of you better stay inside, and I promise you will all remain safe and secure.

What do you get when you pull down your pants in public? Most likely a criminal record for indecent exposure.

a man walks into a house... then realizes its not his house and leaves.

A man walks into a bar. On the way home, he is driving, careers off the road and crashes. Lesson here. Don't walk into poles

I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

What's faster than the speed of light? Not a car

Q: Whats the difference between water melon and a baby? A: Watermelon is a fruit.

A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

What did the docter say to its patient? What?? Im sorry sir you have aids

Why couldn't the baker get a new car? Because he lived in a recession and nobody was buying his cakes.

Why did Billy fall over? Because someone tripped him.

What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

A man in a car turned left at the end of his road. Then he proceeded .1 miles and turned left again, as his GPS instructed him.

What do you call a dear with no eyes. A mutilated dear.

Girlfriend: Hey, you know whats the cutest thing ever? COMIC SANS Stabs girlfriend in the eyes.

What did the blonde say when she saw anti-joke.com for the first time? Nothing. She's been in a vegetative state for three years and her parents finally decided to pull the plug.

a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

Why was Timmy crying? Because he got raped in a van

Why couldnt the pirate get into the movies? Because it was rated pg-13 and his parents didnr likw him watching that

What's worse than rape? Gang rape.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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