How do you get Pikachu on a bus? Pokemon are fictional, therefore Pikachu is fictional, meaning he would never be at a bus station in the real world at all.

What do a helicopter and a banana have in common? They are both edible. Except for the helicopter.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

Why didn't the boy want his dinner? Because it was a bowl of vomit.

What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

whats the difference between a Jew and a piece of pizza? pizza doesn't scream when its in the oven.

how do you get rid of your home work? give it to your dog!

Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

Waseem is a hard worker.

Why couldn't the child with down syndrome zip up their jacket.... it was a button jacket ... you asshole

What's worse than terminal cancer? Two terminal cancer?

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

What's white and is your slave? Your computer.

Q: What do you call an anti-joke? A: An anti-joke

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

My zombie busting team: Tank: The Terminator Mechanic: Tony Stark Demolitions: Superman Medic: Gandalf Bait: Justin Bieber

Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

A mans wife gets pregnant after he has a visectomy... She was artificially inseminated using sperm he froze before the operation

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

Why did the airplane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

What do Alzheimer patients think of the internet. Happy pi day.

Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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