what did the church group do at their picnic? drink the kool aid

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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Its about rewriting the laws of the universe and nothing less, yes yes theoretically the subconcious has unlimited potential (or at least potential we humans cannot theoretically comprehend nor define). But what if I can use my consciousness to trick my subconsciousness? What if I use the subconsciousness to trick the consciousness into tricking the subconciousness?

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Hey how was your audition?" "yeah really good, I got in...

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Gingers

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How did the old guy die? Of death and death related symptoms.

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Who is stupid and no one likes him. Me. :(

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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A man walked into a bar. I shot him

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Knock knock! Whos there? Me. Now open the door.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to get hit and die

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What gets louder as it gets smaller? A baby in a trash compactor.

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? Because he needed to go to work to help pay for his dying daughter's cancer treatment

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting a handjob from Edward scissor hands

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2 wales are at the bar one looks at the other and dose a wale call for 5 long minutes and the other one reply's "dude your drunk we got to go"

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What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

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A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

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What is the coefficient of friction's favourite band? MU-se. What does the coefficient of friction go to see at weekends? MU-seums. What is the coefficient of friction's favourite hobby? Masturbating violently with a noose around his neck.

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what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

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who holds the world record for longest amount of time on fire? Jim Rome

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What's the difference between you and a bucket full of shit? The bucket...

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops