My Mom was strutting down the runway. Then she got trampled by a plane.

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What happens if you type "Michael Jackson" divided by "Friends" on a calculator? DIVIDE BY 0 ERROR.

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Adam Chebali has no life

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what did the left foot say to the right foot? Nothing, feet don't talk

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But who would want to sell us out and why?

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Women's Rights

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What's the opposite of a joke? An Anti-Joke.

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A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

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What is black and white and red all over? Micheal Jackson being torchured

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nickel back

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I scream, you scream, we all scream when hit by an ice cream truck

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Why do the lesbians where pants? Because they are extremely comfourtable and the best for cold days

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What did PSY say about his newest song? Probably something in Korean.

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How are this and that alike? They aren't.

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What is similar between a dog and a cat? They are both dogs except for the cat.

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Q: Why couldn't the little girl ride a bike? A: Because she didn't have legs.

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Why did the old man lose his cane? He didnt. He had alzheimers

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A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear, The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

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A girl is talking with her boyfriend - God, you're selfish!!! - No, i sell meat.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the squirrel.

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Q: What was the proctologist doing on the street? A: He was observing the assfault.

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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a very large and muscly guy walks into a bar and finds a scrawny white guy he asks him if he has ever been in a fight with someone bigger then him the man says no the large man then leaves the bar and they both continue on with their day

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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