Why can't Ray Charles see? Because he's dead.

So there was once this cool little dude that had a purple nose. People would walk by on the streets and say, "Hey! That's a cool nose!" Purple nose man appreciated that they didn't pretend it wasn't there, and instead celebrated the diversity. The next day, he was scalped.

Q. Whats black and red all over? A. A black wall thats been painted red.

Why did the suicidal terrorist swim with fish? He heard the SEALS we coming for him.

Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

Why did the Black guy work at KFC? To provide money for his struggling family.

When Chuck Norris claps, his two hands slam together, creating rather loud soud.

the waterhorse is a beautiful creature. It often frolics through fields of wheat.

Did you ever notice how Bill Nye has a "labrotory" filled with young innocent children? hmmm, very suspicious!

Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

Chuck Norris will eventually die because he is a human being, just like all of us. His movies weren't very good either.

On a scale of 1 to 10, 6 being the highest how confused are you?

What benefits came from the September 11th attacks? None. It was one of the most horrific tragedies in American History

Why did the chicken cross the road? WHAT THE HELL DO YOU CARE? LET THE POOR CHICKEN IN PEACE! No, seriously he was going to his mother's funeral.

The police shouldn't have cars. They should use skateboards and use flowers as their gun. When they catch a criminal in the act, they have to hug him before sending him to prison

joke under this line wins _________________________

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? Well I would open the freezer.

A: How many women does it take to screw in a light bulb? Q: None! They shouldn't have to...

what do you call a prostitute with white eyes? emma , with the cloudy iris,

if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

When life throws you melons, You probably won't catch them.

One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

Roses are red, Violets are violet, If you think Violets are blue you're an idiot because they're called violets for a reason.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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