What happened to your hamster? It died.

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timmy has no arms knock knock whos there? NOT TIMMY!!!

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Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

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the sky is green no it is not

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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Whats louder than a dinosaur? 2 Dinosaurs

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What did one Japanese man say to the other? I don't know, I don't speak Japanese.

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What is brown and sticky? A lot of things are brown and sticky

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Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

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Yo momma's so stupid... she scored poorly on on the SAT, failed to get into a good college, worked at a walmart and lived an otherwise mundane life.

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Brain fart

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What is a ghost's favorite appetizer? Ghosts aren't real.

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Why did Chuck Norris's calendar go from March 31st to April 2nd? There was a misprint

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How do you ask a blonde out to dinner? Politely

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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What did the black guy say when after he jumped in the pool? Wow, its kinda chilly.

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Why did the man die? Supercalifragilisticexpialidosious

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

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Why did the girl take a shower? Because she was dirty

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How much does a dead baby weight? the same amount when it was alive!

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What was pauls mum screaming? Rape

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops