Suicide is never funny Unless it's a clown

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chinga tue madre Ryan

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Oh NOES! She does worry about me! YOU MUST APOLOGIZE! Relax, the body has two sources of happy drugs, one is the sweet calm stuff I am really bad at, and the other comes with adrenaline and stuff, the name of which I do not remember, both are important, but yeah, I am a thrill seeker, and when I do not find them, I make a thrill out of whatever I got, whatever that means.

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What do you call a Mexican with a rubber toe? Rober-to. What do you call a black guy with a big toe? Tobe Bryant

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Whats worst than getting bombed by the russians? The holocaust!

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Q:What did the kid with no arms or legs get for christmas? A: A bike

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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Why can Michael Jackson no longer moonwalk? because he's dead.

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drew edminstin is a rat

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, STDs are contagious. Careful who you screw!

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Why did Adolf Hitler Start WWII and kill millions of Jews? Because he was a poweful dictator

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Your mom is so fat that she turns "One Size Fits All" to "One Size Fits Most"

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What do you call a bad yo mama joke? your mom

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

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Why does Toby suck! Because he sucks!

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In Opposites Land, you might think the opposite of small is big. But no, it's nail clippers.

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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What do you call a blonde falling off a cliff? Screwed.

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What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

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Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

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What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

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Why is it good to date twenty eight year olds? Because there is twenty of them.

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What do you call a piece of Swiss cheese with human characteristics? Abnormal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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