Why didn't the boy eat his vegetables? he was dead

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roses are red violets are blue .no one cares about you, your a jew.

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What smells like old people and is white? Talcum Powder.

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Why did Shakespeare die? It's called life.

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A hooded black man walks into a pharmacy, he caught a cold due to the gelid weather and bought some medicine for himself.

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As I was riding my bike down the road, I saw a young boy being raped in a dark alley way. I proceeded to pedal and acted like i had seen nothing.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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When I became a WoMan, no, its a nice subject, I do not mind at all.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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I was expecting something like that... Anyway, good you do not mind in particular, because that means I am just boring myself here, so, tell me something about yourself you don't tell people most.

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Whats black and white and red all over?? Half a zebra

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Alzheimer's, Roses are red.

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Whats the difference between a dog and a bird? They both fly

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What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

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why does Tom Sawyer like apples? He likes their flavor

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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Why the girl have a crooked leg? Her grandma thought that she was a pretzel and while the girl was sleeping the grandma tried to bend the girls leg into a pretzel shape

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What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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Steven Hawking walks into a bar. Steven Hawking is disabled from the neck down. I lied.

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Guy 1: When your Justin Beiber af. Guy 2: What Guy 1: Do you mean

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What can never be seen by the owner, looks like Jesses mom, and smeels like shit. Jesses dick.

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Your mum's so fat, she attends regular weight loss facilities to lose weight.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

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What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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