Your mom is so fat that she steps on the scale and sees a relatively large number compared to the rest of human society.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's suppose to be a fourth line.

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What's Gay and has a penis? Justin Bieber, I lied about the penis

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why are crocodiles so angry? because they have a lot of teeth but no tooth brush?

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Your mom is so fat that her doctor told her to go on a diet.

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Whats green and smells like grass? Grass scented air freshener, in a green colored can.

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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What did one duck say to the other? "Quack" Ducks don't talk. But if it were to say something it would probably mention how it is concerned about the fact that the majority of people on the internet don't know what ducks say to each other.

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this isn't an anti joke but you guys remember teletubbies?

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what did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? we will never know he never opened it

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Q: What's green and goes through walls? A: A pickle, you just have to throw it really hard.

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So a guy walks into the doctors and say "Doctor it hurts when i poke my knee like this" the doctor says "Let me see your hand" the doctor squeezes the patients finger and the patient says "ow!" the doctor says "now poke you knee again" the patient pokes his knee and says "it still hurts" so the doctor comes to a conclusion and says " you dont have a broken kneecap you have a broken finger, stupid, now get out and leave me alone!"

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How did Jimmy get hit by the car? He dropped his Ice cream cone.

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How you know when dislextic

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Why did the black man offer the girl flowers? It was his niece's birthday.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, can I have a ball? No these can't be removed

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How do you know if you are an alien? When you start maulesting sea creatures for their milk

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i am an arrow and i did not hit your knee!f

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I've lost my tractor!

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Doctor, Doctor. I think I've broke my arm! I'm going to refer you to the fracture clinic.

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A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

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Why did the feminist complain? that's what they do

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A:Whats the air speed velocity of a swallow? B:What an african or English swallow? A:Well I don't know that.

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a white guy walks into a black guy bar who walks out. A. half black half white baby.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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