Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

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whats worse than failing your maths test?

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks him "why the long face?" "All horses have long faces" he replied.

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Put my shoes on the wrong feet. Don't matter, i'm gunna die anyway.

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Roses are red, yup.

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What do you call a cat without a face ? - Kitty !

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What do you call a blonde in a library? Lost

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On a scale of 1 to 10, how high are you? Very.

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I walk the path less taken. Moral: Everything in life is a moral, as far as I care immorality does not exist, everything goes, I AM MORAL MAN!! He`s the MORAL MAN IIS HEE A MORAAL OR IS HEE... (you know Ozzy) AND NOW THAT YOU ARE DOMINATED you can go back to your fun, or reply, again, but you see, at this point I am already elswhere, so if you reply, you lose your control of your nasal coughanalcough nerve endings, and the potency of course.

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his kids.

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Why did the man lose the a race? 'Cause he has no legs

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How did the black guy, get a nice car, house, and attire? He went to college, and got a job.

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Uh... What was emulating again?

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why couldn't jonny ride on a swing? he had no arms or legs why didn't jonny have any arms or legs? he's a potato!

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Why couldn't timmy brush his hair? He had leukaemia

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How do you make a dead baby float? Two scoops of vanilla ice cream and two scoops of dead baby.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What looks like poo but is rainbow colored? Rainbow colored poo.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? names

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Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other, 'Have you heard about this mad cow disease?' and the other says 'Good thing we're penguins.'

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What's the difference between a cat and a dog? They are different species... do i really need to explain the difference??

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Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

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your mom is so ugly that she was made fun of in highschool so much that she now has social issues and a fear of close relationships which is why she left you and your father at age 5

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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