Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

thumb_up thumb_down -14

If Santa and a Blonde woman jump off a building who hits the ground 1st? They both do due to Galileo's discovery of two objects with different masses but similar densities hit the ground at the same time.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man walked into a bar. He left in a body bag.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

knock knock who's there Bob oh hi, come in

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A mexican walks out a mexican restaurant.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An African American and an hispanic man are in a car, who's driving? No one, they are having sex

thumb_up thumb_down -14

wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do fat people and shinease people have in common? They both have a lot of chins.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is dark in the darkness even if you shine a torchlight on it? A blackman

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What is white, black and blue all over? A zebra that was assaulted by Chuck Norris.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. They are baked until ready and then enjoyed be the person who made them.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you know you're on a blind date with a black person? If they agree to eat at KFC in Compton (Wyndellberg)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a feminist that believes that all women have just as many rights as men? Stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what kind of road kill is green and smells like cookies?

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why does Billy Mays yell? He doesn't, he's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What's worse than getting hit by a bus? A: Herpes, AIDS, Diarrhea, Constipation, Castration, Super Herpes, or the song "Friday."

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red, Violets are blue, And really aggravate my allergies.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why do midgets wear condoms? To avoid unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops