Erron who the hell are you? How many people are you going to use before you finish whatever the fuck is on your agenda?

God told John to come forth and recieve internal golry forever. John came fifth and recieved a toaster.

Wait what? What if you use the what what? Sorry I am still like super hypnotic trippy, dont worry though, I dont want it to end.

What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing.

How do you tell if a black man is ok? Poke it with a very long pole and keep your distance...

your mother eats so many chocolates and sugary confectionary that i would recommend a check up the the dentist.

Why did the black man drown? Because he grew up in a poor neighborhood, where no one had a pool, and so he never learned how to swim

A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

what did Charlie Sheen say after he won a game of chess? I just won a game of chess!

what do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating thats odd.

What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

whos gay and sits next to me? Griffen in my architecture class

Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

Q: If your 17 year-old-daughter is a drug addict, how many cartwheels are you going to have to do to make it to Georgia? A: The French Revolution, because your grandmothers facebook shows an 11 year-old selling Concords to a green alien, which can only mean that over 600 people watch porn daily.

If pro is the opposite of con, what is the opposite of progress? Deteriorate

whats the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari. I don't have a ferrari in my garage

what will you do if you become a ruler of the world? Waking up, its just a dream GET REAL!

What's red and weighs a metric ton? An apple, my scale wasn't calibrated

That made no sense... Did you just call me sugartits Nero? Dont you have a wife?

I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

a rabbi and a priest walk into a wall

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 had paranoia.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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