How do you get a one armed clown out of a tree? Hit it in the face with an axe.

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Q. Why cant Stephen Hawking walk into a bar? A. Because he suffered being paralyzed and is unable to walk. So theoretically speaking it is impossible to walk when paralyzed and in a wheelchair unless the victim is out of his or her wheelchair. Please note that the chances of walking when paralyzed are extremely slim.

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Ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they

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what's the difference between a jew and a bar of soap? You don't rub your nuts with a jew.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daffodils are yellow, Flowers come in lots of colours...

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Having a self-conscious baluga hold a gun on you while you hand him all the money you have on you, then realizing balugas are creatures indigenous to aquatic regions, and then realizing you are deep under water and are probably about to die from suffocation

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what is red and bad for your teeth? a brick

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An Aussie, a Mexican and an Asian walk into a bra. You read that wrong.

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Yo mama's so fat that when she went to go get an x-ray, they had to use the one they have at the zoo.

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There's two blondes a black man and a camera man...

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why did the little girl fell off the bed? because she saw his father rape her sister after killing his mother years ago, and every time she goes to sleep, she remembers that and the images come back to haunt her

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Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

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Did you hear about the kid from Oklahoma? Yeah, he died.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree, because it was dead. why did the second monkey fall out of the tree, becuase it was dead. why did the third monkey fall out of the tree, because he thought it was a game!

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why did Sarah fall of the swing... she had no arms Knock Knock.... Whos there .... Not Sarah

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

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I was bangin this girl and she kept yelling the wrong name. Who's rape??

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How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? you open the door and guide him inside

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Whats worse than getting a B+ in Biology? Getting raped by a scorpion.

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Rose are red, Violets are blue, I have AIDS, Now so do you.

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why did the boy get hit by a bus? because he was black

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What did the follower of Neronism say to the follower of Christianity? Nothing, Neronism doesn't exist. -KyuremCult

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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