2 gays monkeys walk into a bar.........

Why did the elephant get on the roof? To jump in the pool.

So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

what's the difference between a chicken and a grape? They're both purple........ except for the chicken

What do you call an black man on the moon. An astronaut you racist bastard

You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

What do you get when you mix Jabba the Hut with a hen? nothing, genetically they are unable to reproduce due to the disproportionate number of chromosomes and DNA

Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

What do you get when you combine a baby and a chainsaw? 30 years to to life in prison.

What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

*knock knock* i have diarrhea

knock knock , who is there the postman the postman who ? the postman who is gonna give you a bill !

Two muffins are sitting on a counter. One muffin says to the other "hello." The other muffin says "Oh my god a talking muffin!"

When life gives you lemons squeeze them at people then run away.

Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

Q:What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpion

Who in Tyrone's black family gave him presents on christmas? Not his dad.

Q: What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

What's the easiest way to make new friends? With Play-Doh.

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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