A muslim man with a long beard and wearing a turban and robe boards an aircraft with a large suitcase. The plane later arrives at its destination a few minutes past the estimated arrival time due to bad weather.

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A blind man walks into a bar... He tragicly attracts aids and dies as the bar is shut down for health purposes

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What do Helen Keller, Stevie Wonder, and Ray Charles have in common? They were all mentioned in the previous sentence.

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You're welcome. On to the next house.

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What's sad about a guy jumping off a cliff? The cliff.

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

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Q: What do you call a dog with metal balls and two-inch legs? A: Animatronic

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What ended the black family's picnic? Rain.

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You know whats better than cold pizza? Winning a nobel prize.

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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What grows best during the cold Winter season? The number of deaths among homeless people.

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What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

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Why did Kurt Cobain commit suicide? Because it was drug related

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Q: Whats black and green and goes 100 mph? A: A black and white car going 100 mph.

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Your mom is so fat That the salesman advised her not to buy the tight dress

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What do you a black man who isn't flying a plane? Well, that depends on his occupation.

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What do you call a black guy in a Walmart? A customer. You prejudice dullard!

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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An astronaut and a cosmonaut are sitting in a bar, discussing who was better. The cosmonaut says, "We Russians were the first people in space!" The astronaut says, "That may be true, but we were the first to land on the moon my friend." The cosmonaut turns back to the astronaut and says, "Yes, but we shall be then first to ever land on the Sun!" So, the astronaut skeptically asks, "And how do you intend to do that?" The cosmonaut replies, "Simple.......we will go at night." Thank you to David Cross

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What's worse than finding 7 dead babies in a bin? Finding one is missing.

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Is your refrigerator running? yeah oh...just wondering.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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