Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

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What do you call a Jew with 20 Pounds of Pennies? A rich man

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Q: How do you know what will happen when the world willl end? A: by experience

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So you're flying around in your bathtub, how pancakes to shingle a doghouse? Airhockey, because pizza bagels can't cry.

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So a plane flies into a world trade centre... That's not funny

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Two antennas falls in love. They get married. The wedding was horrible, but the reception was great.

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What do you call a woman with two black eyes? Irish sunglasses

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the turkey was in the oven and all the farm animals thought the chicken could run the errands in his place just fine.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she was clumsy. Nevertheless the accident was minor and she did not injure the arms that she had.

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Three tomatoes were walking down the street, a daddy, a mummy and a baby and...wait did I say tomatoes, sorry, I meant people.

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why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

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Anyone can post anything.

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When life throws knives at you, run away.

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You should get a new joke book............ because the newest edition has just be released

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What do you call a boomerang that wont come back? Broken.

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Yolo is for losers, I have 9 lives...meow

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How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

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Roses are red Violets are victorious 2 in a chamber Mr pistorius

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There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

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Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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What did the wife say to the husband? I'm a man.

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Whats the difference between a jew and a boy scout? The boy scout comes home from camp.

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The schoolboy said to the bus driver, this is my stop the bus driver replied "no, we have a while to go yet"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops