Why did the chines were sunglasses? It was sunny.

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who is really lanky? james cornish

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A brown park bench was bought. After multiple years the color had faded, and the bench was no longer the same shade of brown.

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Person1: Have you heard about the girraffe who doesn't eat Georgia peaches? Person2: yes. Person1: Oh, never mind then.

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How do you get a one-armed kid down from a tree? Wave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid being killed in the slaughter house.

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: he was sucidal because his kids hate him and his wife cheated on him.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

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How do you eat an Elephant? Elephant meat is most palatable after roasting in a 450 degree oven for 2 hours. Garnish with carrots and broccoli.

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What is big, round, hairy, black with a little bit of white and red stripes, large feet, small hands, squinty eyes and a purple beret? Nothing. How ridiculous.

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Why do dragons shoot fire? I don't know, I'm asking you the question.

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A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are polemicists.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

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A guy walks up to his boy and tells him, "Hey, if you don't stop masturbating you'll go blind." The boy says, "Who are you? Your not my father."

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What's the worst part about aids? Telling your wife and kids.

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your momma's so fat that we are all seriously concerned for her health.

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Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

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Is your refrigerator running? I hope so, or else the food will go bad!

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What did the man say to the teacup? Nothing. He was drunk and on the floor.

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What goes in your mouth long and hard, and comes out soft and sticky? A stick of bubblegum.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops