Yo moma so fat, it ain't even funny. Seriously. She is suffering real diabetes! Do you know how that feels? I though so...

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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why did the duck swim upside-down -he was on quack

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your mother is so fat that I am concerned that her health is at stake and she may develop diabetes and heart disease

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Apple

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How do you make a dick popsickle? ...IDK! I am asking you because you look gay.

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So, a Turtle, a Giraffe, and a Hippopotamus walk into Stop-N-Shop. They are quickly excorted out and the Zoo is contacted to take the wild animals. The Manager wonders why they were there in the first place.

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Sometimes i like to paint myself red and then curl up into a ball and pretend i'm a tomato.

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why did the boat float up to the sky? because everybody on it died including the boat...

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whats fun about the governement's jokes? nothing, they are actually serious

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Why does the girl get humped by a pig? Because she has sexual needs and no other more attractive animal, including an human wants to hump her.

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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What did the little boy say before he succumbed to cancer? Nothing. It was too painful.

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What did the boy who was in a chainsaw accident yell to his mom when he was on a rollercoaster? Look ma, no hands!

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Roses are red, violets are blue; So give me head, or I queue you!

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What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

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Why did the boy fart on his sister? Because he was sitting on her, and happened to pass gas.

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What's brown, smelly, and will never have a job? Poop.

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Penis chickens

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because he had legs.

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what did the leprosy survivor get for christmas a amputation

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What did the Liver say to the Heart? Nothing, Organs can't talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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