I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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i saw amango it splootered

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Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

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Why did Harriet Tubman have to take the underground railroad? Because she was a fugly slut.

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How did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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Donald Trump

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ask me if i am a tree. no.

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Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have a gun Get in the van

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A duck walks into a bar and the bartender asks, "What'll it be?" The duck says that he should get his doctor on the phone because his hullucinations are getting worse.

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An elephant walks into a bar. It was so big that it broke a lot of things.

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Whats the difference between a penis and a vagina? Pancakes,

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why did the black guy buy magnum condoms? because his white friend knew the cashier and thought it would be awkward for himself to buy them.

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What do u call a man pointing a gun at you? A man with an anger issue

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Whats faster than a black guy with a TV? His brother with a VCR.

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Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

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A chink walks into a bar. She is spotted by the secret police and instantly deported. Vote UKIP

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How do you confuse a blonde? Ask her a very challenging question.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I suck at poetry. Nice tits.

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There once was a girl with only one buttcheek. She couldn't go poop. She died.

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Why did Moses cross the road? He wanted to play Xbox with his friend Jeff. Moses was a 12 year old boy from California.

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Why was blueberry flavoured bubblegum cancelled? Because it tasted like soup.

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Why did Suzie fall off the Swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Suzie.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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