Kony 2012 - Uganda Be Kidding Me

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A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

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What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

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Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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lets go to the beach beach lets go get away story of josh browns life

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What do 2 arabs say to each other in a super-market? For those of you who don't know your history, the true Lebanese are Phonecians. As such, they are not Ishmaelites/Arabs. They are from the house of Jaffeth. the youngest of Noah's sons. Arabs are from the house of Shem (i.e., Shemites/Semites), the oldest of Noah's sons, and Hamm, Noah's middle son who fathered Cannah with his mother. Haggar, the woman with whom Abraham fathered Ishmael, was a Cannonite. As such, Ishmael, the father of the Arabs, is half Semetic and half Hammetic. The true Lebanese are neither. Furthermore, the first non-Jewish Christian church was established with the Gentiles (the children of Jaffeth) in Lebanon. And then the shop blew up.

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his bike? He didn't have a bike, his family was very poor and did have much money. Therefore a bike for Timmy was the last of their concerns.

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Lets just say some of my boys owed me a favor, and that if we where all "clean slate workers" I would never have been able to pull some favors out of the higher ups. As far as for "these Shadows" of yours, I know nothing, while I invented the encoding format for the messages you use, I intend keeping it to myself. People here will still assume this is bullshit unless you get somebody to hack this site, believe me, its pretty damn easy to retrieve whatever data might have been lost.

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Why did the black man have sex with the white woman? Because they were married.

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What do you call a quadriplegic man at a museum? "Sir," unless you happen to know his given name, in which case it would be most polite to call him that.

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why did victor sell half of club getaway because he wants a partner why did david buy the half because victors dying

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There was a dog and a cat. What happens next? The cat's not there anymore. Neither is the dog. Can you guess what happend? The dog ate the cat, but the cat was his friend, so the dog committed suicide.

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Why did the Mexicans climb the fence? When they were tossing frisbee and accidentally tossed it into their neighbors yard and they had to go get it.

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Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

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Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

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What's worse than winning a gold medal at the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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Why was the boy crying? Because he got hit by a bus. Why did he get hit by a bus? Because his mom was laughing. Why was his mom laughing? Because she was driving the bus. Why was she driving the bus? Because the boy fell off a swing. Why did he fall off a swing? Because he didn't have any arms. Why didn't he have any arms? Because his diabetic monkey had the flu. Why did his diabetic monkey have the flu? Because the boy was crying.

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What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

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Gerald: Hey did you know I was named AFTER Abraham Lincoln? Gloria: Because he was born in the 1800's and you were born and named many years afterward? Gerald: Ah... I guess I emphasized that joke a little to much - I'm sorry this conversation happened

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Guess what? What? You guessed correctly.

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Want to hear a joke? Too bad.

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Whats the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? The Porsche isn't in my garage

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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