Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

why did the blond sop at a red light? because it was red.

kathryn atkins

Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

A. Why did the chicken cross the road? B. I don't know, why? A. I asked first.

I love bacon therefor I love people who eat bacon execpt people who eat my bacon then I hate people who eat bacon

How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

A brunette, a redhead and a blonde are on the run from the police. They see a barn, and decide to hide inside it. They find three burlap sacks, and each hide in one. The police enter the barn, arrest each of the girls, and sentence them to life imprisonment for murder.

Why was the Asian woman late for work? She was raped.

why did the boy drop his ice cream? he had no hands

What is similar between a horse and a zebra? - If you chopped of there heads, they would die.

What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

A black and a white walk into a bar, d.r. King would be proud.

yo momma!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!11

my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

what do you call when a penis is inside a vagina? sex

What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

Fuck off, seriously, if your name is Tifa, my name is bah, I got better things to do.

Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

Roses are red, lemons are sour, open your legs and give me an hour.

what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...