how did the little black boy cross the river? he walked over the bridge.

An Irishman walks out of a bar.

What happened when the Asian girl got an 89 on her Test? Her parents kicked her out of their house.

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

Why did the black man drown? Because he didn't wait 30 minutes after eating.

What is long, hard, cries a lot, and can't fall down a man-hole? A baby with a javelin through its neck.

why was the pineapple bullied at school? cuz it was a pineapple duhhhhhhh

Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

What's the only thing better than winning a gold medal in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

Why was the boy in a wheelchair raising money to buy a basketball uniform? Because wheelchair basketball is a popular sport

Why were the Dinosaurs wiped out? Porridge.

Knock, Knock Who's there Cluck Cluck who? Cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck - proceed to bob head and flap wings - cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck cluck

What did the baby say to the man? Babies can't talk ,the baby did not say anythingto the man!

a mulslim wlaks past a bomb shop on his way to join the international peace club

Why I am at the hospital now: True as it gets. I found on my working desk a small box of fluoride pills, I was like meh, but it said banana, strawberry, mint and pear, so I was like yeah! And grabbed a mouthful before going URGH! Then my friends entered laughing saying "I hope you do well on that test tomorrow!" So yeah, I passed out, and it turns out my "friends" (victims ill torture to they beg for death). 80 MG OF VALIUM!!! Yeah good trucking luck on my test eh? I nearly died twice, somehow, I think I should ask doc if my heart is okay or something, my head is fucked up the floor is all wavy and I cant differentiate numbers Seriously, one guy was gonna come visit say sorry, but he sent his girlfriend instead... My wife was so worried, that when I said: Mind if I have my vengeance by screwing his girlfriend? My wife said: I was so worried, you still okay? That actually sounds like a good scheme... So, yeah... I am typing this because, I am totally going to have a threesome... When and if my ever wakes up again... She agreed... She was always kinda into me but still! If you dont understand this, well... Next time, if you want to poison me, USE SOMETHING THAT KILLS ME! BECAUSE I WILL BE BACK!

What did the cat say to the bird? Nothing. It's a cat.

What is better then winning the special olympics? Not being retarded

Why did the Jewish business man cross the road? A: to go to his reasonable paying job at a business.

A lonely man walks into a Self-Esteem class. He sits alone in the back because of his low self-esteem. Forever alone.

your momma so fat, that she secretly crys every night, because she is so self concious about her weight. and has to talk to a therapist because shes bolemic and has suicidal thoughts, because she cant stand the way she looks

A dyslexic man into bar walks a.

a black person was walking into his home. good thing balls like apple juice and Miley Cyrus was keeping guard with her sword.

How do you have problems paying your monthly mortgage if you live in a box emmanuel

What did the cake say to the icing? Come here

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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