Knock,Knock Who's there? The Police, Your under arrest for urinating on a toliet.

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When life gives you lemons you make orange juice so people will say "How the hell did you do that?"

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CALLER: Is your refrigerator running? OWNER: Yes, it's working just fine.

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why did the boat crash? a tomato was driving

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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What's white and red all over? A white guy who walked in the ghetto.

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why was the black man scared of cats ? Because a gang of cats ate his family

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What did the man say when he found a bar of soap in his mailbox? Why is there soap in my mailbox?

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

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A black man, a jew and a muslim walk into a bar. ... I forgot what happens next, so let's just say they have a good time and get back home safely.

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A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

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When life gives you lemons You've got some lemons.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sally

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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What is the similarity between Moses and Muhammad? They both have the same letter starting their names

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A fully grown cow walks into a man's house and says to him, "Hey, how have you been?" Traumatized by the vivid circumstances, the man falls to the floor and begins sobbing relentlessly until he passes out onto the floor from a violent mental breakdown.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate rhyming, Vacuum, purple, zebra.

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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Why wasn't my friend laughing at my jokes? Because his grandpa is dying.

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Why did Emily fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Emily.

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Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops