Roses are nice, Violets are glorious, Try not to scare, Oscar Pistorius.

What do you call a guy that just shit himself? Me

How does a woman scare a gynecologist? By pulling human entrails out of her purse when he asks her to provide insurance.

Roses are red Violets are blue The more you know

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the baby get for his birthday? An Abortion.

What did Osama bin Laden say to Jesus? Nothing. He's in hell.

Why was Ethan talking to the potato? Because he is stupid.

chickens, roads, horses, bars,roses, violets, sally, knock, knock, fnord

Why are large breasts so awesome? Cleavage is sexually attractive to both men and women

Q: Whats worse than spilling milk? A: Cancer Q: Whats worse than cancer? A: Rebecca Black

Why were our jokes deleted? Because it's anti-joke.

When is it unlucky to see a black cat? When you are a mouse.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

Person 1: Ask me if I'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

Boner

What's worst then finding a worm in your apple??? Yo momma

hey! Wanna hear a bird joke? No. Well this is Hawkward....

3 out of 5 smokers die And apparently the other 2 become immortal

Yo mamma's so fat she attracts other matter with a force proportional to the product of their masses divided by the square of the distance.

Knock-Knock Come in! ...

women are like puzzles because prior to 1920 neither had the right to vote, puzzles still don't.

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, if it weren't for the women our peckers would rust. By:Jhonny Thomas Spikes & Trenton Thomas Prather

Hey do you know who is in the yard? Not the boys, they all died in a horrific fire last Christmas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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