Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

What's the best sound in the world? Children screaming

what types of people have big noses? people whose parents both carried the recesive gene.

Why did Julie fall off a swing? 'Cause she had no hands. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Julie, that's certain.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sally

What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

Hey Shea

What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket? No. A picture of a red bucket? No. A photo nailed to a red bucket, which shows a red bucket with a very realistic painting of a red bucket on it? Yes.

Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Whats white and sticky? Glue.

Why did the black man drop his weed Because he got shot

We can consider a wind turbine as a great ventilator that produces heat.

What does a penguin and a watermelon have in common? They all come from Earth.

Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

Faith, Family, Friends, those are three words.

Why was the student late for class? Because paraplegics can't drive.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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