What did the cookie monster eat? Food

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why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

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Q: What's the difference between a black man from San Diego and a white man from Miami? A: They live in different cities, and in the presidential election, the black man voted for Obama and the white man voted for McCain

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Q: Why can't Carl drive? A: Carl is a stone

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What's so great about twenty-three year olds? There's twenty of them.

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a boy scout wipes his butt with a dollar cause he had no toilet paper then the other boy scout hears him screaming they meet up later and the other boy scout askes why he was scream and the first boy scout says that is hard to wip your butt with 4 quarters.

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Roast Beef is a solid and Pea Soup is a liquid

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Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

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How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

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yo mamma so black, she was left out in subzero temperatures for an extended time period and suffered major frostbite all over her body, causing it to become grotesquely black.

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

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A man named Hank, from Idaho takes a trip to Michigan. When he arrives, he rents a house and starts a meth lab. Hank is spending 7 years in jail. Hank was charged with stealing.

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Why did the two children go sledding? Because they liked to sled.

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Why did the squirrel fall out of a tree? It was dead. Why did the second squirrel fall out of a tree? It was cruelly stapled to the first one.

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When Chuck Norris realized that there was a more superior being than himself. What did he say? Suck it Safka

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Q: How Do you make a baby be quiet? A: slowly chop it's head off with a blunted axe once it's head is off eat it

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How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

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Why couldn't the little seven year old girl paint her finger nails? She fell in front of a train.

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What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

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what did the boy with dyslexia get for his birthday? bad grades

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Roses are der Violets are eulb I am dyslexic

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What's red and smells like cherries. Cherries

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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