A jewish man walks into a bar has a drink then walks out of the bar ...

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hey i just met you.. and this is crazy. but here my facebook so add me maybe!!

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Two muffins are in an oven. And by muffins I mean jews. They both die a horrible death.

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Why did I post a joke on this website? Because I felt like it.

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How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a girl? Consensual sexual intercourse between two young adults.

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What did the black guy, the Mexican guy, and the Chinese guy have for lunch? A sandwich

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Why did Suzie fall out of her swing? Because she had no arms.

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A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

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How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Any number if compressed sufficiently. At neutron star density all babies in the world would fit.

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LO AND BEHOLD!

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What's the difference between a duck and male black prostitute? The duck is says quack

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25

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if your having girl problems i feel bad for you son, i don't have any.

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Many people protest. they go home after a few hours

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A Serbian Film

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WITH YOUR RED THUMBS COMBINED! I AM CAPTAIN MORAL! You: GOOOOO (AWAY) MORAL! CAPTAIN MORAL MAN, IS A HERO, GONNA TAKE GREEN THUMBS RIGHT BACK TO ZERO... Moral: Okay that is all I remember about the Captain Planet Theme song... GIVE ME RED THUMBS MUAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA! PS: Redhead, three months have passed (more or less) I wont call you because we agreed you would get of this fucking place, but I can visit you if you are a good little girl! And yeah I am calling you Red, Tifa just reminds me of Final Fantasy and your big bosoms so yeaaaaah get your little red haired cunt over here so we can chat yes?

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How long did it take Jeff, a middle-aged man with a lifelong speech-destroying lisp, to overcome his impediment? Less than ten minutes, as carbon monoxide is a colorless, odorless toxic gas that eliminates oxygen at a rapidly-acting rate inside of small areas such as the car Jeff locked himself inside.

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Guy: Roses are red, violets are blue, you're beautiful and sexy too. Girl: Roses are red violets are blue, how many girls have you told that to? Guy:... Girl: Exactly.

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How do you keep an idiot busy? Give him something to do.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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how many dead babies can fit in a microwave? 3 1/2

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What is about the size of a sausage, flesh-colored and looks like a penis, if you illuminate it with a flashlight on monday nights? - a penis.

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Roses are black violets are black I can't hear anything I'm Helen Keller .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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