What happens when u poke a ghost that is standing on the edge of a building? Ghost aren't real so therefor u will fall of the edge and die

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How did the newborn baby come out of a man? It was ejaculated as a sperm from his testicles

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Hickory dickery dock, two mice ran up the clock. The clock struck 1 and the other got away with minor injuries.

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A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

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What is the difference between your mom and a vacuum? The vacuum does not use your mom to clean the floor since it is an inanimate object and can not control people.

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Why did Bill fall out if his chair? He was hit by an airplane.

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Q: What did the Catholic man say in response to the gay man asking what he likes to do? A: golf

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Because she had no arms... Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: Where's my tractor

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roses are red, violets are blue when ever l flush the toilet i think of you

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Why did the woman make a sandwich? Because she was hungry.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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Coming this fall, A hilarious movie for the whole family to enjoy, actor Rob Schneider play a very normal man would goes to work everyday to support his family who he loves more than anything in the world, critics are saying that this is the most vulgar slapstick comedy of the year as Rob Schneider teaches his two adopted kids the power of Jesus Christ. Coming this fall... The Nun's Birthday Rated R for excessive nudity of Rob Schneider and an asian hooker.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

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what would george washington do if he was alive today? he would scream and scratch his coffiin

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Why did Timmy miss school? He was killed in a tragic school bus accident

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side -Tag

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knock knock

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Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

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Why did the kid get on the bus. Because he had to go home

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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