A duck walks into a bar. The bartender asks " What'll You Have" The duck doesn't respond because it's a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the black man get arrested? He sold cocaine.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An English man, a German man and a Canadian man stood on the edge of a cliff. The English and German both jump off. What happens then? The Canadian says "they were serious?!" and runs away to fake his death and live the rest of his life as Frank Brown.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Kinky = using a feather Perverted = using the whole chicken Weird = using chicken bones Downright disgusting = all of the above, plus a cat

thumb_up thumb_down +4

The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red Violets are blue Join the bro army! BROFIST! http://www.youtube.com/user/PewDiePie :D

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Due to a lack of awareness of its surrounding, it died attempting to cross the road.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Rudolph poop while flying over Chicago? Actually, he had to go since trip started, and that's just where it happened to land.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the little boy cry? He fell down the stairs

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What day comes after Friday? Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? Peer pressure

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A barman walks into a bar. He works there.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

your so vein that doctors find you really helpful when giving you injections

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Fight fire with with fire! That would be impossible, it'd just make the fire bigger. And probably kill you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did the boy fall to the ground? He was struck by lightning

thumb_up thumb_down +4

theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do a helicopter and a banana have in common? They are both edible. Except for the helicopter.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops