You have three biscuits. Your friend eats two. How many biscuits do you have? A: 3 Your friend is bulemic so he throws them both up, so you still have them.

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Someone thinks Justin Bieber is strait

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How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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We were hooking up and her mom walked in, i stood up, apologized and left

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Why was the boy hot? Because he was stuck in an oven.

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How did the fat kid stop the bus? He didn't...

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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What is the big difference between chopped pork and pea soup? One of them involves the killing of an intelligent animal and the other involves the harvesting of seeds from a non-sentient plant.

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Q: What's wrong with the world today? A: Everything

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What happens when you cut Chuck Norris? He bleeds

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Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

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If pro is the opposite of con . Is congress the opposite of progress?

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A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

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Whats red and is bad for your teeth? A brick.

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WHat is the one thing an alcoholic needs everyday? Rehab.

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I can't see my forehead

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How do you keep your dog warm? Put antifreeze in its water dish.

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What do u get when you cross Napoleon and a stick of dynamite? A very bloody mess.

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Whats worse than a pile of dead babies? A live one at the bottom.

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Why did people call the girl a cow? Because she was fat.

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OMG LOOK I FOUND A MAGIC DECODER RING

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Two black guys walk into a bank They work there.

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how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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