Your momma's so fat: She regrets not making the most of her youth whilst she was still attractive.

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? Because he is no longer alive.

Your momma's so old she might die soon.

A man walks into a bar. He bumps his head on the iron and has headaches for a week.

Why did a mass amount of people move to Florida? They came to murder their children and get away with it.

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

jamie and danel texta like to make love to each other using a gerbal as a toy when they make love they get a african covered in jelly to help them.

One,two,skip a few... five,six,seven,eight...(and so on ad infinitum)

What did the irishman say when he walked into a bar? Ouch

What do you get when you mix a black person with an octopus? i dont know. but it sure picks cotton well.

A midget walked under a bar.

What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

A horse goes to the mall and when he is in the checkout line there is a man at the cash register the man at the cash register says "Why the long face?" and the horse replies "hey buddy, watch it!!!!!!!"

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

9/11 jokes are just plane wrong

P1: why did the chicken cross the road? P2: to get to the other side. P1: Knock! Knock! P2: whos there? P1: THE CHICKEN!

a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

Why did the chicken cross the road? This website is terrible. Are you servers from 1990? I hope you all get cancer.

Two hunters are out in the woods, one of them collapses on the ground and his eyes roll back in his head. His friend whips out his cell phone and calls 911. He gasps,"I think my friend is dead, what do i do?" The operator says,"calm down lets first make sure he's dead." There's a silence, then a shot. Sadly the man was not dead but extremely tired and could not carry on without rest.

We are few Nero, too few, if I want to split my money with you, would it help you find true happiness?

Two guys walk into A bar. The third one ducks.

Why did the white guy sit on the toilet? So he could take a poop.

Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

An Asian man walked to P.F. Changs, and asked where the bathroom is.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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