What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

What do you call a cat up a tree in a party hat? A cat up a tree with a party hat

there are two muffins in an oven. one says "its getting hot in here". the other says " oh my gosh!!! its a talking muffin!!!"

How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

So there's a monkey in a bar. I forgot the rest of the joke but your moms a whore

What do you call it when you almost win? You lose.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

A boy with one arm walks into a rock climbing facility and quickly realizes that his dream of being a rock climber is impossible because he is blind.

Why did Billy run away from a mysterious adult? He was playing the iconic game known as tag where 2+ people chase each other in an attempt to tag them.

I once heard a funny joke, it was as funny as a funeral

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

why was the carrot sad? it was stuck in an antelopes anus

George Bush=Bush Dick Cheny=Dick Colin Powell=Colon Condoleezza Rice=Rice One of these doesn't belong here.

If I had a dollar for every time I heard a 'women's rights' joke I'd be bill gates.

What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

whats worse than a bee sting, two bee stings, whats worse than two bee stings, the holocaust, whats worse than the holocaust, tree bee stings...

what did one deer say to the other? nothing, he was shot during hunting season.

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

A man jumped off a bridge. He went bungee jumping with his family and had a great time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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