What is black white green blue and is wet and blind and deaf and homosexual all at the same time? What ever I just described

What did the monkey say to the Pope and the Queen? Good evening, Your Holiness. Good evening, Your Majesty,

There were two friends, a girl and a boy. The girl had a ribbon tied to her neck, and every day the boy asked her why, yet she'd never tell him. They grew up together, and fell in love and still, she wouldn't tell him why she had the ribbon on her neck. They got married, and grew old, and still she wouldn't tell him. But one day, she said to him 'I'll show you why I keep this on my neck' and she took it off and her head fell off.

How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

How do you shock thomas eddison? Attatch his kite to his balls.

How did the baby survive the car accident? He didn't. He was killed on impact.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

how do you make holy water? you burn the hell out of it

Dear 6, Please stop hitting on me, I heard you've done some pretty dirty stuff with 9. Sincerely, 7

Q - What's the difference between a sack of dead babies and a trampoline? A - I take my shoes off when I jump on a trampoline.

roses are red violets are blue my dick hurts blue waffles

Yo momma was so ugly that everybody died.

You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

Me

whats the difference between an orange and a dead baby? one is a tasty treat and the other is an orange

You're as useful as Baby P's dummy.

your mother is so heavily obese, she became one of the 60 million individuals in America who are obese today.

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

Diarrhea

what is the worst thing a priest could do to a little boy? brutally murder him

1.Why were the black men asked to leave the bar? Because it was a womens bar. 2.Why did the 40 year old get an erection? Because he was excited.

Two egyptian soccerclubs are playing, what's the score? Over 70 dead

David entered a radio contest to see who had the best pun; his pun was insufficient and he did not win.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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