A man and a woman have drunk, unprotected sex, and 9 months later, they have a beautiful baby girl. What did they call her? An accident.

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A bar walks into a man and the man walks into a watermelon then the watermelon walks into a black guy then the black guy walks into a piece of fried chicken then the piece of fried chicken walks into a hotdog then the hotdog walks into a wall then the wall walks into a horse then the horse walks into a jar of mayonaise then the jar of mayonaise walks into a can then the can walks into the bar

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Hey I just met you, And this is crazy But I just kissed you... And I have rabies!

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven kind of looked like an alligator.

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What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

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Why did the 80 year old man lose his vision? Because he recently blew his head off.

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One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

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test test

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I love results day! for every A* I get 30 pounds! everything else I cut myself.

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A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

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Q:What did the slut have in her mouth? A: teeth.

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How do you write an anti-joke? With the keyboard Or voice recognition software

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Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

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Like if you have a vagina. Also like if you have a dong. (Penis)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I told him to. I'm very influential.

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If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

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An Irish man, an English man, and a Scottish man are standing on the edge of a cliff. The English man and the Scottish man both fall of. The Irish man calls the authorities to alert them of this tragic misfortune.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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So there is a muslum, then he flew a plane into a building and died a sudden death. But he was wearing a helmet.

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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What's funnier then a dead baby. Two dead babies.

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What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Have you seen Jamal's socks?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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