Roses are brown, Violets are brown, Tulips are brown, I need to stop working on my flower garden after fisting a cows butthole.

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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Whats a buch of blacks running down a hill called? The Detroit, MI marathon in seeing that 84.3% of Detroit's population is of Arican descent.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Jeffery Dahmer. Oh, good, you're finally here!

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Yo momma so fat, she was recently diagnosed with type 2 diabetes and is at great risk for developing heart disease!

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Why couldn't Ariel talk in the Little Mermaid? Someone slit her throat.

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Why was john's balls itchy? Because he recently gained a severe infestation of pubic lice.

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What do you call a Mad Cow? Dead. Pst, Mr.Cobb if your reading this- Hola.

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3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

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"What's wrong?" "I can't fap." "Why not?" "Because I saw your face."

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A blonde, a red head, and a brunette are on an island. Due to the law of averages, this isn't that unlikely or significant.

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penis

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Three men walk into a bar. One of them is not planning to consume alcohol because they are responsible and he is the designated driver.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

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A Jew walked into Germany. He never walked back out.

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Your mama's so fat that when she farted, gas came out!

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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osama bin laden is dead

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Do you know what killed the cat? Feline AIDS

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what do mr. potato head and micheal jackson have in common? their noses come off pretty easily

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There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour. Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry." "No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away." "I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."

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What's hard when you eat a vegetable? The wheelchair.

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why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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