Q-What do you call a dog with no legs? A-Nothing because he cant come over to you anyway..

hi

Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

What did the crazy asian man say just before he died? He didn't say anything- he was in an 18 month long coma due to a brain stem stroke. He left behind a wife, a 3 year old daughter and a newborn son.

A black guy , a white guy and a jew walk into a resturaunt They are offered the special.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't because he's CHICKEN.

two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin turns and says "boy it`s hot in here" the other muffin can`t bring himself to explain to the other they are about to be eaten alive.

why is six afraid of seven? because seven is a jew!

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? She had no Arms or legs Knock knock Whos there? Not Sally XD XD XD XD XD XD XD

What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

What did the plane say to the twin towers on 9/11 - Nothing, how do you expect planes to talk, stop hallucinating and stop with the drugs

Why did hitler kill the Jews? Because he had sever mental illnesses and anyone who thinks the holocaust is funny deserves to die a slow death.

What's old, silver, and smells like old cheese? A fork with old cheese on it.

Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Because he was dangerously fatigued from staying up all night weeping passionately into the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of twenty years after the CEO of the company declared bankruptcy and finding out that his only daughter was in the hospital in critical condition after her school bus flipped off a bridge.

I'm on the seafood diet, a large proportion of my daily food intake consists of fish.

What did the homeless man say to his family? Nothing. His family left him after he lost his job.

What's the best way to suprise your friend? Shove a banana up his ass.

Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

What is an antijoke? Not Knock

You have 10 apples and 12 cabbages How many pizzas can you fit on the roof? Purple because aliens don't wear hats.

Why was the hasidic so stupid? He wasn't. He died in the holocaust.

Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

How did the boy compliment the girl? He told her she had a lot of breasts. In return, she told him he had many penises.

Going out for a quiet one, having a drink or two, and returning home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...