There is a blonde, Santa and Jesus. Someone throws a million dollars on the ground who picks it up? Me because I shot them

What did the wife get her husband after they had intercourse? A sandwich, because she loved him and knew he was hungry.

Why won't Santa be delivering presents this year? Because he can't be bothered.

Lol, she does not think anything, she knows. Its not unfaithfulness if you ask for permission and are granted so because the trust is strong and mutual.

Okay.

Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

knock knock whos there a duck a duck who QUACK!

How do you knock up a Catholic girl? Put your penis into her vagina without wearing a condom.

What do you get when you offer a blond a penny for his thoughts? Change.

Who is it?

Have u ever noticed why a Police car siren isnt as loud as an ambulance siren? Do u know why that is? Because i dont, and i would like to know because my over active and curious brain is pounding through my skull and throbbing with question and wont stop until i know the answer!

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

why did the firefighter let the fire burn... becuase of inattentivieness. he will soon be fired.

People who are addicted to brake fluid just can't stop.

Why did the chick cross the road? Because she's a gold digger homie, dat chick is greedy like a mofo. She be all up in your grill and sheit tryin' getchu to spend your money lik dat homie ditch dat hoe, she aint even worth it brotha.

why did the girl fall off the slide? she was pushed, by her dad...

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Porn

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It didn't.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Mets.

Billy wanted a toy for Christmas. Sadly, Billy died before Christmas.

drugs sex and alchohole are yumme as AIDS

A black guy, a white guy, and an Asian guy walk into a library. They were getting help from the Asian guy on their math homework.

Why did dave not hug his wife? becuase he said she looked horrifying from the war in iraq.

Okay, but lets write a contract, if you regret your decision at anytime, you get it all back, minus what I have spent of course, both I and my wife have always wanted to live in a house by the sea, hopefully you nearby. You know, I have never been truly happy because I thought I could change this world, now I know that I tried and failed, maybe I can change myself instead, they say that true change comes from within.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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