Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want to hear first?" The man responds "I'd like to hear the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance covered everything." The man hangs his head and tears up as he asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor heads for the door as he answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments or appointments will be paid for." The man snaps his fingers and says "Damn! I should've voted Democrat!"

What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One is fun to smash with a sledgehammer. The other is a baby.

Obama

What do you say if you see a floating TV at night? Wow a floating TV. It's amazing how far technology has progressed throughout the years.

A duck, a goose, a turkey and a bald eagle were all flying together. All four of them were shot and killed by drunk hunters with machine guns. The hunters were promptly arrested by police authorities for shooting their national symbol. They were found guilty, and the other three birds were cooked for their last meals.

Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

Yo momma so ugly..... what more do you want

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

Lets Go Lakers!

why'd the chicken committed suicide?? to get to the other side

what is the most confusing day in the ghetto fathers day

roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

A bar walks into Chuck Norris.

why is the sky blue? - because you have herpes.

How long does it take for britney spears to change a light bulb? Fish can not leave the water without dieing.

How did the man kill the black fly? He called the KKK fly and had it lynch the black fly

How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? answer: Where's my tractor?

How are leprechauns and lions similar? The both start with L.

why did the girl scream when she got her tooth pulled? Because it hurt her.

whats worse than being out in the cold? Being on the sun.

What did the widow get for mother's day? A miscarriage

How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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