Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to its dying chicks who were just run over.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? no... Well, It's really nice. :)

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There were three blondes hanging off a freezing cold helicopter. A burnette, a red head, and a blonde. The redhead's hands were getting cold so she let go so she could blow on them to keep them warm. She fell off the helicopter and down the cliff. A little later, the burnette did the same thing, i mean their hands were cold. But the blode then said " guys, your doing it wrong. You have to do it like this." She blew one hand at a time, " not like this: she showed them how they did it and fell off too.

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Why couldn't the blond get into the library? Because the library was closed therefore the door was locked.

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How do you hit a clown off a swing? There are many was of acting upon this situation but the most successful approach would be hitting the clown with a heavy object,

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Knock knock Whos there Bill O hey bill

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Man walks into an apple store. Shortly after he leaves with a fully charged phone.

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Cry me a river. Then build a bridge and become a structural engineer.

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Knock knock. Who's there?

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how do you wake up lady gaga? set her alarm for a reasonable hour

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Dead.

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Ask me what my name is. What's your name. My name is Jeff.

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Q: What's the upside to your otherwise miserable life? A: You only got raped twice last week.

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Why did the jew cross the road Because he was being cornered by 10 nazis that had automatic guns

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse does not reply because it is a horse. The horse walks out of the bar kicking over some chairs and scaring some people because he is a horse and horses do not belong in public atmospheres.

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A man walks into a store. He purchases what he was intending to, walks out, and gets on with his day.

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What did the blonde waitress say to the man with a curly moustache? Good evening, are you ready to order?; yes [x2]; and what would you like with it?; certanly; there you go; no, I'm sorry; right.

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What happens when a black man is swinging in a tree? He is enjoying the swing set I helped his father put up.

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A plumber walks into a bar and the bartender says "What will it be?" and the plumber says "no drinks thank you, I'm here to fix the toilet."

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A dog, a cat, and a a fish were having a conversation while their owners were away. Ashton Kutcher is a murderer.

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your know what grinds my gears? when I throw my car into park while going 90 on the highway.

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Teacher- What comes after 69 Boy- Mouthwash?? Teacher- LEAVE!

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Why did the man cross the road He didn't, he died after being hit by a car

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops