Q:How many Elephants can you fit in a Audi quatro? A:It just sits on a leaf and waits for the autumn... Moral: Just sits on a three and waits for it to turn into four.

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In the movie Dark Skies, little white boys were haunted by a mysterious force. The answer is obvious, isn't it? They are being haunted by Michael Jackson's ghost.

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Knock knock. Who's there? AV. AV who? Asshole vison. Now that's Amusement Vision. (Remembering Amusement Vision...)

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What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

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4 score and 7 years ago was 1965

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How many NRA members does it take to change a lightbulb? MORE GUNS!

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What did Stevie Wander get for christmas? A book

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What did the black guy do in the hood? walked down the street, bought the paper and watched Letterman.

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There are 2 men are standing on the roof of a building, one of them jumps off, the other one is named Peter

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-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

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Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why was 6 scared of me? cause i ate 9

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what has two feet and is black all over? your mom after she died in a horrific house fire.

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What do you call a growing family of micro-organisms? Cancer

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knock knock who's there? pizza man ok

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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What did Mel Gibson say to the African-American? I'm sorry

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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What do you call a sheep? something to have sex with.

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There are 10 kinds of people in this world. Those who understand binaryy and those who dont.

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A man and a woman are having sex. The man finishes and says, "Oh, God, I hope you're on the pill." The girl says she isn't and begins to cry. Lacking a job or a stable life, the man leaves the woman. The woman has an abortion and suffers irreversible damage to her ovaries.

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What's the most popular fruit in the U.S.? Bananas What's the most popular vegetable in the U.S.? Stephen Hawking

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How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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