what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

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what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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There once was a man from Nantucket.

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You're welcome. On to the next house.

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what did Russell wilson get for Christmas a seahawk..

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A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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Yo Dawg, I heard You Like Kittens and Volcanoes... So, I threw Your Kitten In A Volcano.

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Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

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Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

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Stop looking at these jokes and go fuck yourself.

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"New season of Dr.Phil. How does that make you feel?" ANGERY!!!!!

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Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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How many electricians does it take to screw in a light bulb? One.

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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What has four legs one head but only one foot? A dog that was born with physical deformities.

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What do you get when you cross a bungie cord and an owl? My ass :)

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Knock knock Who's there? Benjamin Benjamin who? Benjamin Dover Ben! I'm so glad you're home the kids have missed you so much!

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What do you call a someone who steals from a black guy? A thief.

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Why did the boy die? He got hit by the school bus.

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Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench? An effect of an overcrowded theme park

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What do you have, if you have fists the can kill someone in one punch? Hulk's DNA

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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