Why did the baby die? Lack of oxygenated blood to the brain.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Max. Max who? Max who starts his greeting with,  "In accordance with Megan's law"  

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal, and this wasn't just any road. It was the new highway built, with frequent traffic jams and a speed limit of 90 mph.

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What did the comedian say when he fell off the cliff? Nothing; dead beings are incapable of performing actions.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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An Irishman walks into a bar.....Duh.

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Why didn't suzie eat? Because she wasn't hungry

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Why are there so many anti-jokes about refrigerators? Because the writer of the joke was pressured by terrorists that would kill him if he didn't write about refrigerators.

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Terry's penis oh wait! what penis But I'm not a rapper

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How do you know when your pizza is ready? When the oven timer goes off, indicating that it is done.

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You die of loss of blood, under a pile of first-aid kits

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I HATE GEORGE LOPEZ

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Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

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This is in Spanish when you're not looking.Just kidding, that's not possible. It's actually German.

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what did the purple horse say to the goat? horses don't talk....

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Why did tigger look in the toilet? Because he is being treated in a mental institution and eats his own fecal matter.

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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Why did the black man get shot Cause someone shot him

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A cheetah walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve re cheetah, as cheetahs are an endangered species and does not want to risk the cheetah succumbing to alcohol poisoning.

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What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

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what is the ??? crust^2 + Cool Whip

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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