Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

Whats white and sticky? Marshmellows

A man is at the doctor's office and the doctor says to the man: "I'm sorry sir, you have AIDS and Alzheimer's disease." The man says: "Well, at least I don't have AIDS!"

what kind of pizzas did the twin tower executives order on 9-11? two large "planes"

Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

what do you call a man that is hurt? A: you call him an ambulanse

What do you call a psychic midget who has escaped from prison? Wanted by the police.

A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

How do you keep an idiot in suspense? You watch a suspenseful TV program and pause at the right moment.

You're tearing apart, Lisa!

Chuck Norris once stared in a show called Walker: Texas Ranger.

Whats the differents between a red farrari and a dead baby? I dont have a red farrari in my garage;)

Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

Why couldn't Helen Keller Drive? Because she was a woman.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are the same.

Why wouldn't they give Helen Keller a driver's liscense? Because she was a woman.

Why didn't the dog want to cross the road? there was a flea market on the other side.

What's got four legs but can't move by itself? A chair.

-funny? women have rights -funnier? civil rights

Im black and want attention. I also love fried chicken and love Africa call for a good, African-American time..... Im black 4025406623

Why did the cookie go to the doctor? To get his chemotherapy

Roses are brown Violets are brown who the hell took a shit in my garden?

When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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